Message Area
Casually read the BBS message area using an easy to use interface. Messages are categorized exactly like they are on the BBS. You may post new messages or reply to existing messages!

You are not logged in. Login here for full access privileges.

Previous Message | Next Message | Back to FUNNY Jokes and Stories  <--  <--- Return to Home Page
   Networked Database  FUNNY Jokes and Stories   [173 / 347] RSS
 From   To   Subject   Date/Time 
Message   Daryl Stout    All   How Do They Survive?   October 13, 2017
 12:04 AM *  

Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the
menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12
Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a half dozen nuggets.
 
"We don't have half dozen nuggets," said the
teenager at the counter. 
 
"You don't?" I replied. 
 
"We only have six, nine, or twelve," was the reply. 
 
"So I can't order a half-dozen nuggets, but I can
order six?" 
 
"That's right." 
 
So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets. 
 
*******************************************************

The paragraph above doesn't amaze me because of what
happened a couple of months ago. I was checking out
at the local Foodland with just a few items and the
lady behind me put her things on the belt close to
mine. I picked up one of those "Dividers" that they
keep by the cash register and placed it between our
things so they wouldn't get mixed. After the girl
had scanned all of my items, she picked up the
"Divider" looking it all over for the bar code so
she could scan it. Not finding the bar code she said
to me "Do you know how much this is?" and I said to
her "I've changed my mind, I don't think I'll buy
that today." She said "OK" and I paid her for the
things and left. She had no clue to what had just
happened..... 
 
*******************************************************
 
MAKES YOU WONDER HOW THESE PEOPLE CAN SURVIVE!!! 
 
A lady at work was seen putting a credit card into
her floppy drive and quickly. When inquired as to
what she was doing, she said she was shopping on the
Internet and they kept asking for a credit card
number, so she was using the ATM "thingy".... 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 
 
I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping
beside her car. "Do you need some help?" I asked.
She replied, "I knew I should have replaced the
battery to this remote door unlock. Now I can't get
into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a
distant convenient store) would have a battery to
fit this?" "Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm
too?" She handed it and the car keys to me. As I
took the key and manually unlocked the door, I
replied, "Why don't you drive over there and check
about the batteries it's a long walk." 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 
Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too
swift. One day she was typing and turned to a
secretary and said, "I'm almost out of typing paper.
What do I do?" "Just use copier machine paper," the
secretary told her. With that, the intern took her
last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the
photocopier and proceeded to make five "blank" copies. 

*****************************************************
 
IDIOTS AT WORK... Sign in a gas station: Coke -- 49
cents. Two for a dollar. 
 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 
 
IDIOTS & COMPUTERS My neighbor works in the
operations department in the central office of a
large bank. Employees in the field call him when
they have problems with their computers. One night
he got a call from a woman in one of the branch
banks who had this question: "I've got smoke coming
from the back of my terminal. Do you guys have a
fire downtown?" 
 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 
 
IDIOTS ARE EASY TO PLEASE I was sitting in my
science class, when the teacher commented that the
next day would be the shortest day of the year. My
lab partner became visibly excited, cheering and
clapping. I explained to her that the amount of
daylight changes, not the actual amount of time.
Needless to say, she was very disappointed. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 
 
Police in Radnor, Pennsylvania, interrogated a
suspect by placing a metal colander on his head and
connecting it with wires to a photocopy machine. The
message "He's lying" was placed in the copier, and
police pressed the copy button each time they
thought the suspect wasn't telling the truth.
Believing the "lie detector" was working the suspect
confessed. 
 

--- SBBSecho 3.01-Win32
 * Origin: The Thunderbolt BBS - wx1der.dyndns.org (1:19/33)
  Show ANSI Codes | Hide BBCodes | Show Color Codes | Hide Encoding | Hide HTML Tags | Show Routing
Previous Message | Next Message | Back to FUNNY Jokes and Stories  <--  <--- Return to Home Page

VADV-PHP
Execution Time: 0.0664 seconds

If you experience any problems with this website or need help, contact the webmaster.
VADV-PHP Copyright © 2002-2024 Steve Winn, Aspect Technologies. All Rights Reserved.
Virtual Advanced Copyright © 1995-1997 Roland De Graaf.
v2.0.140505

Warning: Unknown: open(c:\Sessions\sess_n8pve03i6iski6o1jcjm3nq0k4, O_RDWR) failed: No such file or directory (2) in Unknown on line 0 Warning: Unknown: Failed to write session data (files). Please verify that the current setting of session.save_path is correct (c:\Sessions) in Unknown on line 0 PHP Warning: session_start(): open(c:\Sessions\sess_n8pve03i6iski6o1jcjm3nq0k4, O_RDWR) failed: No such file or directory (2) in D:\wc5\http\public\VADV\include\common.inc.php on line 45 PHP Warning: Unknown: open(c:\Sessions\sess_n8pve03i6iski6o1jcjm3nq0k4, O_RDWR) failed: No such file or directory (2) in Unknown on line 0 PHP Warning: Unknown: Failed to write session data (files). Please verify that the current setting of session.save_path is correct (c:\Sessions) in Unknown on line 0